#2: Thor: Attaching a Lightning Rod to the Lightning God

If the Hulk is the most physically powerful of the team featured in the Avengers movie, Thor comes in second. If the Hulk can be stopped by a capable team of humans with no special abilities, Thor can also be neutralized. Time to open the file.

Dossier #2: Thor Odinson

Biology and powers description: Seemingly-human form features extreme levels of strength and endurance. Thor is capable of flight, apparently via willpower. Thor wears armor from the dimension or planet Asgard, and carries the hammer Mjolnir, which is impossible for any but Thor or one of an extremely select number of honor-designates to lift. If summoned, Mjolnir will physically fly to Thor’s hand regardless of where it is stored. Thor displays the ability to control or direct lightning, which may or may not be an ability of Mjolnir, rather than Thor himself. CAUTION: Thor is labeled by Scandinavian mythology as a god, and there is an ongoing debate in our organization and outside about whether he should instead be considered an alien. As Asgard is undoubtedly a real place, populated by a variety of entities from Scandinavian mythology, it is the opinion of the authors of this dossier series that the god/alien distinction is a distraction. When Thor is referred to by attribute in this document, he will be called an ‘entity.’

Psychological description: Thor, when effective, has a fixed honorable-warrior personality. When Thor fails to uphold his personal code of chivalry, the effect is palpable—Mjolnir stops responding to his commands. Thor should be considered of average but not exceptional intelligence. He is generally unfamiliar with human technology.

Capture scenario #1: Thor’s dangerousness stems from four factors: (1) enhanced strength, (2) flight, (3) Mjolnir, and (4) lightning control. Attaching a lightning rod to Thor may eliminate or impair his ability to direct lighting, but Thor is a highly mobile target, and likely has the strength to rip off any rod. Successful capture of a hostile Thor is dependent on neutralizing his strength. For this purpose, development or appropriation of a malleable and adhesive foam is recommended. This foam, if attached to Thor, should operate as a sort of balloon-shaped mobility limitation suit, hobbling his ability to walk, stand, or grasp anything, including Mjolnir (his hands should be entirely encased in balls of foam). The foam should have the distinctive property of not inhibiting Thor’s actual muscle movements, considered too powerful to directly chain. Rather, the foam should be very thick and internally flexible, preventing Thor’s movement arcs from actually accomplishing anything. If applied appropriately (perhaps through spray cannons, and in tandem with a more powerful adhesive helping the foam to stick to Thor’s skin) Thor should be unable to use his enhanced strength effectively, and should be unable to physically seize Mjolnir. Once the foam is in place, the lightning rod can be inserted, which will potentially neutralize three of four of Thor’s dangerousness factors. The final factor, flight, is linked to Thor’s will and cannot be mitigated via foam. However, using the heavy adhesive to glue the encased Thor to a prepared slab of dense material may prevent his foam-encased body from escaping. Note that an encased Thor would be not be able to use his muscles to aid in liftoff, and would not be able to build up to speed. The slab approach to restraining Thor’s flight may nevertheless be insufficient. In this case, the assault team should have a negotiator on hand to appeal to Thor’s honor as a warrior, and convince him to acknowledge defeat. The fact that Thor should be unable to grip Mjolnir at this point, and would have to leave it behind to fly, should be extremely persuasive.

Capture scenario #2: The second capture scenario purely attacks the social weaknesses that stem from Thor’s honorable warrior ethos. If Thor’s father Odin can be convinced that Thor’s dalliances on Earth have violated a part of the Asgardian warrior code, Odin may be able to convince Thor to peacefully surrender to American civil or military authority. If, as is likely, Odin is unreachable or unable to be persuaded on this point, Thor may be convinced of his violations by agency negotiators directly. The agency may be able to falsify evidence of Odin’s anger in order to encourage Thor’s surrender. While an officer posing as Odin is unlikely to be personally believable, given the distinctive physical characteristics of Asgardian entities, a letter or messenger may have sufficient apparent validity to be utilized.

Custody scenario #1: While Thor is extremely strong, his physical capacities are not limitless in the same way as the Hulk’s. It stands to reason that a prison made of bought or stolen Asgardian metal would be firm enough to withstand Thor’s potential breakout attempts, especially if foam remained on Thor’s hands to prohibit his utilization of Mjolnir.

Custody scenario #2: This scenario rests on the ability of agency technology to fully contain Thor. If the entity is contained in foam, and placed inside a large hollow ball (the cell) in turn placed on a large circular underground track, momentum from Thor’s efforts at willful flight may be converted into torque, spinning the hollow ball wildly but not rotating it open. Within the ball, Thor can be monitored by surveillance technology, and nutriment can be provided at appropriate intervals. Ideally, Mjolnir can be situated inside the hollow ball in such a way as to be useless in Thor’s foam-encased hand. Tricking the magic in this way will prevent Thor from making endless attempts to summon Mjolnir.

Political Considerations: Given Thor’s status as the child of the head of a powerful sovereign nation, steps must be taken to ensure Asgardians do not attack en masse to free him. Therefore, Asgard must either be convinced Thor’s captivity is appropriate (see Capture scenario # 2) or convinced it is not appropriate to engage with the United States. Placing the blame for Thor’s capture on a pansy set of actors outside the agency may remove the threat of Odin’s wrath, and hiding the prison where Thor is stored may outlast it (further study of Asgardian projective military capacity is needed to determine if hiding Thor while taking responsibly for his capture is feasible). During negotiations, the Asgardians, being honorable, may agree to imprison Thor themselves if we agree to give him up. This option is reasonable. Even if Thor is released from Asgardian prison, he likely will be encouraged not to return to Earth, and banishment is, for our purposes, akin to imprisonment.

#1: The Hulk: Being Smashing

Say you have a rogue superhero. A Superman. A Thor. Someone tough. How do you stop him? Maybe you get another superhero—one of the Avengers, one of the JLA. Maybe a whole team, if the rogue in question is a really heavy hitter. But what if all the superheroes are compromised? What if the mooks of SHIELD are all that’s left? Or, what if the superheroes still seemed to be out there doing good things, grabbing people from midair as they fall off buildings, but the President of the United States wants to round up mutants and metahumans one and all, because people with powers are too dangerous to bounce around as vigilantes?

Pretend you’re the Director of the CIA. The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs. The world you’re in has people with superheroes. Famous ones, from the stories that we in the real world know. How do you comply with the President’s orders, when you’re up against a class of people that can throw around tanks and maybe, on the far end of the scale, even move planets?

Carefully. With a lot of planning and logic.

The file below is for the eyes in agency with billons of dollars in funding, but not a single superhero on the payroll. An agency that has been tasked either to take superheroes in, or come up with plans in case the President decides to give the order, but has access to nothing more than real-world human technology.

Let’s start reading the document. Let’s see how to stop the Hulk.

Dossier #1: Hulk (Bruce Banner)

Biology and powers description: Human base state. Metamorphosis in seconds to muscular ‘Green Hulk’ form when enraged. Green Hulk form’s rage-fueled strength and endurance without defined upper limit. Green Hulk form can be maintained indefinitely during confrontation. Secondary hulk forms have occasionally been sighted, and are assumed to have similar physical capacities.

Psychological description: Bruce Banner is often transient, and has difficulties trusting people, including himself. Human Banner frequently displays passivity, meekness, and fear. While human Banner is a scientist, interested in studying gamma radiation that turned him into a monster, the aggressive Green Hulk form appears to have a distinctive, less cerebral, personality. Recordings of Banner indicate he is not pleased with his transformed state, as he often warns individuals not to make him angry. CAUTION: There is some evidence to suggest Banner does remain in control while in Hulk form, feigning lack of presence during the altered state. Casualties during Hulk incidents are traditionally low, and the Hulk often targets supervillians.

Capture scenario #1: If officers can find and engage human Banner while he is sleeping, passed out, or in a similar unconscious state, application of tranquilizers may be sufficient to maintain the passive state long enough for Banner to be transferred to a long-term incarceration facility. CAUTION: As Banner’s transition to Hulk form is extremely rapid, and the Hulk form displays high resistance to sedatives, Capture scenario #1 is considered optimistic.

Capture scenario #2: Hulk incidents typically involve Banner’s altered form. In engagements with the Hulk, it is key to understand that Banner’s rage-fueled strength and endurance have been shown to scale to the challenge at hand. Bullets, missiles, and even superhuman strength (not that we have officers with the third asset) are known to have limited stunning effects at best, and accelerate the Hulk’s power enhancement process at worst. Any attempt to defeat the altered form must be highly tactical. Deployment of low-friction surfaces may deprive the Hulk of the ability to leap or fight accurately. Abandoning efforts to physically disable the Hulk in favor of creating a pattern of distractions (perhaps using circling jeeps) may trap the Hulk in a repetitive or predictable series of attacks. Bullets in general should be considered to have utility purely as attention-manipulators, and for that reason, should be as low-caliber as possible, in an effort to delay or deny the Hulk’s power enhancement process. Attacking the Hulk with sealant canisters aimed at the eyes may create a temporary blinding effect and provide time for the deployment of additional low-friction surfaces or harassment vehicles.

The goal of this scenario is to keep the Hulk from moving off-site while gradually reducing the intensity of the conflict, in order to encourage Banner to return to human state, so that he can become susceptible to sedatives. Utilization of satellite or other long-range surveillance may allow officers to set up an extremely wide perimeter for this purpose, allowing the Hulk to believe the combat is done and triggering a revert. Depending on the size and sophistication of the surveillance net, the endgame of this scenario may be identical to scenario #1. CAUTION: Assault teams should be prepared to go through many iterations of the reduction-in-confrontation-intensity cycle before Banner is in custody. Successful tranquilizing may not be possible, which will require study of Custody scenario #1.

Custody scenario #1: In this form, skirmishes with the Hulk proceed indefinitely, while efforts are made to corral the creature in a non-populated zone. Combatants will be continually cycled in-and-out, to maintain fresh wardens. This form of custody may be highly expensive, but has the advantage of not allowing the Hulk to know he is in custody, which may prevent escape attempts. This form of custody is considered feasible because the extreme threat level associated with the Hulk may attract requisite funding.

Custody scenario #2: This plan assumes that the human Banner is successfully injected with a sedative, allowing transfer to a built facility. Because of the boundless nature of the Hulk’s power, incarceration within a general population is unfeasible. Banner in human form may be kept in a sensory deprivation tank, attached to a feeding tube, and maintained on a diet that includes sedatives and other agents aimed at disabling or distracting his consciousness. Keeping Banner unconscious indefinitely may be ideal. More optimistically, a battery of tests combined with endocrine surgery may remove Banner’s physiological ability to become enraged, and allow him to be transferred to a more humane isolation cell. Even in the case of successful surgery, moving Banner to general population or allowing parole is not recommended, as he still would be saturated with gamma radiation, with attendant dire consequences if his ability to become enraged is restored.